Bipolar Disorder, Suicidal Thoughts & Depression. His Story.
Bipolar disorder, suicidal thoughts & depression. His story starts at just 16 years old, when Ross Szabo was diagnosed with bipolar disorder which escalated to depression, suicidal thoughts, anger control problems and psychotic features. At just 17, he was hospitalized for attempting to take his own life. He has found a way to not just survive, but thrive and has gone on to speak to over a million people on a mission to normalize mental health disorders. If you want to do healing work like Ross, join a life-changing, 6-week online course for $49. Starts July 16, 2015 and will be the most fun and transformational soul work you've ever done. Release shame, stigma, secrets and live your authentic, fullest life! Sign up here: www.kirstytv.com/ Ross talks about what was going on in his life during his teens when things were at their worst for him. He explains how he felt it was easier to use alcohol as a numbing agent than wait for medication to ease his depression. As he began to drink, his bipolar symptoms changed. As oppose to mania and depression, he began to have massive bouts of anger. It wasn't until he began to have hallucinations that people began to get scared and respond. "The hallucinations are not something you forget. When it first starts happening to you, you're in this state of paranoia because you don't know what's real." Ross explains the details of hallucinations and how he was able to rationalize and understand what was happening to him. After entering a deep state of depression, he struggled with taking his own life for 4 months. Eventually, he attempted suicide and was hospitalized. He was seeing a therapist every 2 weeks for those 4 months and never once mentioned his suicidal thoughts to them. He didn't want to die, he just didn't see a way out of his bipolar disorder. Ross is so brave to explain his feelings and rationalizations of that time. He wishes that he would've, "Had the understanding that it took more strength to talk about it than to hide it." The turning point came at age 21, when his parents admitted to him that they didn't think he would live to be 21 years old. He had never seen his parents cry like that. A while later, after drinking excessively, he laid unconscious for 21 hours. When he woke, he looked at himself in the mirror and told himself that he was either going to die or have to change. That was 5 years after he was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. "No one ever asked me, 'How does it feel to have bipolar disorder?'" "I think the reason mental health disorders and self hatred are so closely tied to each other is because they fuel each other." I ask him what he needed to hear during that crucial period. Ross shares, "I think I need to explore further how I did feel about having these emotions as oppose to just having them. I think I needed to be asked, 'How does it feel to hallucinate and what does it feel like to have all these people laugh at you. And to have these situations in your life that you can't control?'" According to Ross, the best part of his life now is being able to be in the moment and enjoy emotions for what they are instead of being afraid. If you're out there and you're dealing with mental health issues like suicidal thoughts and/or depression and you're somewhere on that spectrum wether it's dealing with anxiety, a major trauma or it's escalating into something more like the bipolar disorder, I hope that you do some of the things we discussed to experience your life potential. Leave your comments here or on my blog at KirstyTV.com. You can join also join us on kirstytv.com/ to see what Kirsty TV is all about. Sign up here kirstytv.com/ebook-signup/ for a free ebook of 100 inspirational quotes and VIP updates on our interviews with celebrities, everyday people and experts. My hope is that you hear something universal Ross' story, that you connect with his raw honesty and vulnerability. Perhaps you will realize, you are not alone... I want for everyone to be at peace with who they are (warts and all) and to learn, grow & heal through hearing another person's story. KirstyTV.com is a safe place for anyone to share their story without judgement. We love and support everyone who is part of our 'Kommunity' and love for everyone to get involved. So please join the conversation on my blog (kirstytv.com/) and don't forget to subscribe to my channel. The conversation continues on facebook facebook.com/KirstyTV Twitter twitter.com/KirstyTV Instagram instagram.com/kirstytv/ Pinterest pinterest.com/kirstytv/ Google+ gplus.to/KirstyTV I can't wait to connect with you, so let the sharing, healing and learning begin...
